I hate puns, I'm sorry.
I love eggs. I'm not sorry. A week ago I tweeted about my love for eggs because I had a lot of free time at work and took to the internet to find out how to poach eggs. That being said, poaching eggs is a difficult task. Its kind of like the devil of egg making. I'm sure when the devil orders eggs he looks at the chef dead in the eye and asks for his eggs to be poached and watch the chef squirm in fear.
But back to the real story here. I fucking love eggs. I can eat eggs every meal of the day if that was possible. And it is. I've done it. It was wonderful.
Here are dishes that eggceeded my eggpectations (I hate puns I'm sorry).
- Eggs Florentine
Step 1: Make hollandaise sauce
Step 2: Poach Eggs
Step 3: Spinach. Lots of it.
Step 4: Butter bread with I Can't Believe Its Not Butter!
Step 5: Assemble like Lincoln Logs, eat in a messy manner
BEST WHEN: Hungover
- Eggs Blackstone
Step 1: Make Eggs Florentine
Step 2: Make Bacon
Step 3: Remember that no person in their right mind likes spinach and use tomatoes
Step 4: Consume
BEST WHEN: Spinach sucks. So, always.
- Vegetarian Skillet-Baked Eggs with Spinach, Yogurt, and Chili Oil
Step 1: Google egg recipes at work
Step 2: Cry because its beautiful
Step 3: Fall asleep at your desk
Step 4: Dream about eggs
Step 5: Don't get fired
BEST WHEN: At work. Can't have eggs. Weeping into your keyboard.
- Benny Burger
Step 1: Make a burger
Step 2: Add an egg
Step 3: Call it dinner
BEST WHEN: You want eggs for dinner and don't want to be judged.
- Arif's Signature Hangover Bowl
Step 1: Be hungover
Step 2: Wake up (note: you must state you are going to stop drinking forever at least twice)
Step 3: Find leftover meat from the night before
Step 4: Scramble eggs, add meat to pan until eggs are cooked
Step 5: Garnish with everything Jalapenos (seeds in for more regrets)
Step 6: Put into a bowl and tell your liver you love it
BEST WHEN: Probably on Saturdays. And Sundays too. I'm not here to judge.
ps. did you miss me?